As a 23 year-old man, there’s a few things I really enjoy: chicken wings, Quentin Tarantino, cancelled plans, and video games. I’m not what the internet (apparently) would qualify as a “gamer”, since it seems sites like IGN disqualify you if you don’t spend at least 40% of your income on games. Apparently, sections of the universe exist where “gamers” mock non-gamers since they aren’t game-y enough. If I went onto an IGN message board, I would likely be ridiculed for being a “n00b” since the only games I always buy are Madden and Call of Duty. That would be like if the head scout of Alabama’s football team called me to make fun of me for not watching enough AAA Alabama High School football.
So I guess I’m not a gamer, per se, since I don’t play a ton of games, but I do love the games I love. I’m a big fan of Assassin’s Creed and to this day I still love playing Pokemon games. I consider the Elder Scrolls: Skyrim to be the greatest game in existence and I’m happy to give EA Sports $60 every August for the new Madden game.
Since this article has already taken a decidedly nerdy start, I guess I’ll just keep rolling with this. Recently, I purchased the new Call of Duty game, I think it’s called “Advanced Warfare”, although the name is more or less irrelevant. If you aren’t familiar with the Call of Duty series, then congratulations on your escape from captivity in the wilderness and allow me to catch you up on things. In the Call of Duty series, you take on the role of a literal God of War, acting as an expert in both infantry and stealth, while exhibiting a master level of marksmanship, an exceptional knowledge of all military technology, as well an as ability to absorb infinite amounts of damage, provided you take the occasional rest behind a shed or pile of bricks to restore health. I’m just now realizing this is pretty unrealistic for a game who stresses realism, but that’s an argument for another time.
Anyway, I’m the type of person who believes all first person shooter (FPS) games are pretty much exactly the same. What I mean by this statement isn’t the story, graphics, game modes, weapons, etc, it’s more of a reference to the workings of the game itself. In a FPS, you are equipped with a weapon which you aim at an enemy who you then kill. This process is repeated several dozen times over the course of a level, at which point the game decides enough carnage has been provided to the fictional people of whatever worn torn country or planet is being portrayed and the level ends. One of my best friends HATES this argument, but I think it’s reasonable and he doesn’t have a blog so HA!
As I was saying, I purchased Call of Duty, and despite its simplicity, I was impressed. I’m playing the PS4 version and it may be the most visually stunning video game I’ve ever played. The graphics are simply incredible. Kevin Spacey, who plays a guy not named Kevin Spacey, but seems loosely based on a character played by Kevin Spacey, looks exactly like Kevin Spacey. Cut scenes in the game are so theatrical I seriously had to question if I was looking at animation or actual human beings, including Kevin Spacey.
The story mode is pretty average and predictable, but it stays interesting, mainly because Kevin Spacey is crazier than Lex Luthor from Superman Returns, who is played by Kevin Spacey. The gameplay is flawless, as I experienced virtually no glitching, and the control layouts were explained well and worked to perfection. I will say the story mode took a definite step forward, as it probably lasted about eight hours, almost double what some previous Call of Duty story modes managed.
Most people don’t give a squealing dolphin fart about the story mode, though. No, what really gets people excited about Call of Duty is its legendary online multiplayer mode. I’m usually a strict Domination of TDM type of guy, but I did notice several new modes have been added. The most obvious addition to the game, however, is the new exosuit, which gives the players extra perks such as faster healing times, ability to absorb more damage, etc. Every exosuit also allows the player to double jump like Super Mario, a feature which I’m sure will incite gratuitous amounts of violence, in-game and out.
The new Call of Duty game is pretty good. I didn’t intend for this to be a review, but I guess it kind of ended up being one, so I’ll give the game like 7 out of 10 stars or something, I don’t know. If you like good graphics, feigned realism, being verbally abused by Korean 12 year-olds, and Kevin Spacey, go out and pick up Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare, or whatever it’s called.